People Notice

It was a typical morning in the Milana home. Pregnant and well into the second trimester, I walked with a now basketball-sized belly alongside my wonderful husband and our two rambunctious dogs. Our alarms had woken us at the ripe hour of 4:30 for our usual walk around the neighborhood. With Ryan’s busy coaching schedule and Alabama’s guarantee to produce unbearable heat during the day, this uninterrupted time to connect was something we both treasured. Sometimes we would talk each other’s ears off, rambling about all our innermost thoughts. Other times our stroll would be quieter, and we would just enjoy the other’s company. At this point in pregnancy, my tendency to get out of breath meant our pace had slightly slowed. Some mornings the walk was cut short for a rather urgent potty break. Nonetheless, this morning was beautifully ordinary, and we didn’t think much could surprise us before the day even got started.

We were just making the final stretch towards home, and the sun had started to make its appearance. As daylight emerged, we were met with an unexpected third party. A neighbor, who we had never met, was making her way inside after parking her car in the driveway. Unpredictably, she struck up a conversation. Most people at 5:30am would make a beeline for the door without so much as a second glance, but not Marcella. We soon learned that she worked the night shift at Walmart and was coming to her parent’s house to pick up her son for school. She asked how far along I was and if we would allow her to purchase our baby a blanket. When we insisted that she didn’t need to do that, she caught us completely off guard.

Marcella joyfully shared that she had noticed us before. This wasn’t so strange, given our house is located on the most highly trafficked road in the neighborhood, but she wasn’t finished. She proceeded to recount witnessing our morning routine, from Ryan loading up my car with my many teacher bags, to the smiles we exchanged and our “goodbye” kiss before peeling out of the driveway. Both of us soaked in her words and tried to squash the discomfort we felt from feeling so seen and receiving such specific, kind praise from someone we just met. She pressed on, sharing how struck she had been with our interactions. I can still visualize her beaming smile as she spoke. She had noticed the way Ryan cares for me, the way we spend our time together, the way we look at each other. Just in the little glimpses of our life she had seen, snapshots we would’ve discounted as minor, she had taken inventory of all the ways our love was evident and was a vessel to proclaim God’s love to the world. We were met with the rare opportunity to view our life through the eyes of a stranger.

Ryan and I finished the short walk home a little stunned. Although we both have always recognized what a gift our marriage is, we never operated under the idea that we lived the kind of life that would ever attract the attention, much less praise of a stranger. When we got inside, both of us instantly recognized that this exchange had been a gift from God.

Not everyone receives the unique opportunity to hear firsthand the impact their life has on the people around them. Often, we are simply the day laborers who work to grow in holiness and further God’s kingdom in the most minute, insignificant ways imaginable.

We can strive to remember this wisdom and carry it out in our daily lives, that even our little tasks are seen and cherished by our Father in Heaven, but it is easy to get discouraged along the way. The enemy tempts us to buy into the notion that none of the trivial, mundane things we do matter. That all this stuff we must do is just getting in the way of our true happiness. That our lives are far too ordinary, and sainthood must come with more trumpet flare and look much grander than this. Look at the culture we live in- modest husbands, wives, and families rarely make headlines. Listening to these thoughts easily leads to hopelessness and cynicism.

Thankfully God, in His Goodness and Mercy, has an eye for the details. There is no good deed too little or kind word too quiet. Our Lord sees us pick up our spouse’s dirty socks off the floor for the fourth day this week and smiles. He notices the way we change each diaper, no matter how stinky, with love for our children and is filled with joy. He observes us tenderly as we wrestle with the toddler during Sunday Mass, trying with all our might to make it to Communion. He reads our hearts and minds and knows every time we show self-control to withhold that comment, that sour glance, that thought that tells us to harbor anger or resentment about our daily responsibilities. Although we may not always be in tune with His presence and voice in our daily lives, we know He is there with us in every tiny fold of our day.  “Your Father who sees in secret will reward you.” Matthew 6:4

I am reminded of Mother Teresa’s well-known quote:

“Wash the plate not because it is dirty or because you are told to wash it, but because you love the person who will use it next.”

And St. Therese of Lisieux:

“Remember that nothing is small in the eyes of God. Do all that you do with love.”

We can be encouraged to know that every little task we attempt or complete with love is like a seed planted in God’s garden. As is fitting, God provides the growth. It is simply our duty to be obedient and keep scattering seeds of love.

Whether you ever are blessed with the opportunity to hear how your testimony impacts the people around you or not, please accept this as your reminder that God sees every effort you make to radiate His love to the world. He sees the ways you bear your family with patience. He notices your pause to seek His guidance before you react to adverse situations. He even values your futile attempts to grow in holiness when all virtue seems to fly out the window.